Learning to Walk Again

Today I did something I wasn’t sure I’d ever do again. I crossed the finish line of a 5K race. 

Admittedly, I walked the whole thing, but I was still overwhelmed with gratitude to God for walking beside me on this journey of recovery for the past 5 years.

Less than 24 hours before my AVM rupture and subsequent brain hemorrhage in January 2020, I ran 5 miles as part of my training for the Wendell Foster Half Marathon & 5K. It would be my sixth half marathon. I was never a fast runner, but I always enjoyed the challenge of training and the sense of accomplishment I felt after sticking to my training plan and finally crossing that finish line.

On January 5, 2020, my running days ended when a tiny blood vessel in my brain ruptured and caused a massive brain bleed. 

When I finally left the hospital after 43 days, I was in a wheelchair with partial paralysis and no guarantees about when (or if) I’d ever be able to walk on my own. 

Over the course of 18 months of physical therapy, I slowly progressed from maneuvering with a wheelchair to walking with a walker, then a quad cane, and then a single point cane. I transitioned to wearing an AFO brace on my left leg, which eventually allowed me to walk without using a cane at all.

I distinctly remember the first time I walked 15 feet unassisted during physical therapy. I cried happy tears and felt a glimmer of hope that up until that point, I had been too afraid to acknowledge.

I began walking on my own, in addition to working with my physical therapists. On June 10, 2020, I walked a little over a quarter mile with a walker, but it took me almost 45 minutes. On Feb. 24, 2021, I walked 1.31 miles in about 52 minutes, but I felt like I had climbed Mount Everest.

Today, I came full circle by competing in the Wendell Foster 5K race. I walked 3.1 miles in 61 minutes. 

I am as proud, if not prouder, of the 5K medal from today than any of the previous race medals I have ever received. It’s a testament to the truth of that proverb, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” (Lao Tzu). What began with  a few steps and then walking 15 feet progressed to walking a quarter mile, and then a half mile, and then further and further until today I was able to do what had once seemed impossible. 

I’ve made no secret about the fact that I miss my running days. I have foot drop, nerve damage, and muscle weakness that make running impossible. That being said, I am so very thankful that I’m able to walk at all, even one slow step at a time. 

I’m already looking forward to continuing my regular walking plan and participating in another 5K. The goal is to keep moving forward and keep making progress. As Abraham Lincoln once said, “I walk slowly, but I never walk backward.”  

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For more about my health journey, including the trauma of my health crisis, my recovery journey, and how my faith provided strength on even the most difficult days, check out my book, His Timing: A Journey of Faith, Hope, and Healing.

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